Saturday, April 28, 2012

Shared Struggle

But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, "Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid." And Peter answered him, "Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water." He said, "Come." So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, "Lord, save me."Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, "O you of little faith, why did you doubt?"And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased. And those in the boat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God." Matthew 14:28-33

And Jesus being who he is granted Peter's request, saying "come." I wonder what was going through Peter's mind at that exact moment? Was he scared, excited, hopeful, or all the above? Whatever he was feeling inspired him enough to step out of the boat and into what seemed like, an impossible situation. Peter didn't just step out of the boat, but he was propelled forward. With each step he got closer and closer to Jesus, until finally reaching him. Who knows the distance between the two, or the time it took, but Peter made it to Jesus (the vision, his destination).

However the story goes on to say, "but when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, "Lord, save me." Matthew 14:30 Maybe it was a strong gust of wind, one big enough to sway the trees in the distance, or maybe it was only strong enough to blow up some dust on the shore. Regardless Peter didn't have to feel the wind, he just saw it, and that was enough to distract him and cause anxiety. After all who knows what those winds were blowing in. Peter, starting to sink cried out, " Lord save me." Again, Jesus grants Peter's request and immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying "o you of little faith, why did you doubt." and when they got into the boat the wind ceased. Matthew 14:31-32

There have been so many times when I've asked God to affirm himself to me, to give me direction, instruction, and He has been faithful to do so every time. I can believe and trust him for a time after, but then I allow the wind(distractions, worries, anxiety, and my logic) to create doubt, which immediately draws my gaze and focus from him, to self reliance. My blurred vision of him then compels me to figure out how I can be the hero in my own life. How can I make this, or that happen on my own if you don't come through? What are my strengths and weaknesses? Flooded with questions paralytic fear sets in and I believe the lie. I will not make it, I will not survive if this storm comes. And because I'm trusting in myself and my own ability I start to sink.

But God is always faithful to answer my cry when I call, and because of who he is, he comes to us in a direct course to our rescue. Like Peter I have no reason to doubt. He has provided me with everything I've needed, and not just me, but those around me. I've experienced Him be a Father to others as well as myself and yet there's still doubt. Peter just before walking on water to Jesus witnessed him feeding the five thousand out of only five loaves of bread and two fish. Matthew 14:17. So Peter just like I knew what Jesus could do. He'd seen and experienced it. I believe and am learning that the only way to triumph over doubt is to press on through it. What I mean by pressing on, is keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus. Not allowing doubts to create a chasm between us and the Savior. This chasm: those distractions that lead to doubt, have one purpose and that is to deter us away from the Holy Vision. It's important to remember that it wasn't Satan that caused the fall. He was only a catalyst, but the fall was caused by our doubt. Genesis 3:1-3

Helen H. Lemmel once wrote " Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in his wonderful face and the things of earth with grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace." Many of us have sang this refrain several times in our lives, but few of us live it out with consistency. Jesus will always be faithful to bring us through the storm. He may not at times take it away, but he will certainly guide us through it, graciously granting to us a deeper understanding of who he is. "And when they got into the boat the wind ceased." Matthew 14:32 I wonder what Peter thought of Jesus in that moment when all was still?