Today I turned 28. What! How did this happen? Where did the time go? When I was 17 this land where I dwell now(late twenties) seemed so distant. It's funny how when we're younger we wish we were older, and once we get older some of us wish we could jump in a time machine and go back a few years. Getting older is hard work. I mean it's tough coming to grips with your own immortality, to live with no regrets, and to accept the fact that your life may not ever look the way you thought it would when you were younger. However in Christ there is always hope. He turns our youthful plans into something grandiose, regrets into possibilities; opportunities for repentance. And as we get older he continues to mature us in our faith until one day our mortality will lead us to heaven where we will dwell with him for eternity. Twenty seven was a great year, but it was a tough one. I spent a lot of time questioning God's plan for my life, teeter-tottering back and forth from impenitence to regret; asking God to somehow change some of the circumstances in my life that I thought should be a little different, or at least a little easier. It's in these times that I forgot that long suffering is part of being conformed to the image of Christ. So it has been in these circumstances that God has grown me the most, purifying my motives and mortifying my flesh. As painful as that process was and still is, it is a blessing. And the lessons learned from the process are weightier than two lifetimes worth of Gold.
To recap what God taught me at 27 has been challenging. My vocabulary doesn't seem to contain the words I need to be as descriptive as I would like, but I'll give it a try anyway.
This time last year I embarked on a new adventure and moved to Tallahassee. Since moving here I have experienced God's provision like never before. His faithfulness to provide transportation, housing, and a job within a month of my getting here was astounding. Through it I learned that His sustaining provision has not, and will not fail me. I really can trust Him to provide my every need. Psalm 39:5; Psalm 54:4; Psalm 55:22
There were several times over the last year when I just wanted to do my own thing. This led me into a rebellion against God, but even in my disobedience His grace, patience, and mercy towards me never ceased to flow. He never stops being God. Even in our rebellion he cannot deny himself. "if we are faithless, he remains faithful for He can not deny Himself." 2 Timothy 2:13; Psalm 23:6
Sometimes I get impatient. I am a doer at heart. I hate to admit that, but it's true. To me, being active equates being useful and sometimes this is not always true. Waiting on God is sometimes the only action that needs to be taken. We are being refined and prepared even in those times when it seems as if i'm doing nothing. Waiting is not a curse or a punishment, but waiting is part of God fulfilling his purpose for me. Psalm 27:14; Psalm 37:34; Psalm138:8
I hate letting people into my life. Allowing someone to love me and allowing myself to fall in love with them has always been hard for me. Intimacy is scary. If I learned nothing else over the past year this last lesson would've been enough. It's one that I wrestle with daily. Intimacy with Christ is a privilege. One that is often taken for granted. It's not a discipline, although it can be found through practicing spiritual disciplines, and it's not a ritual or something that can be faked. Intimacy is familiarity with God, through Christ. It is knowing him personally and allowing him to know me personally. Ultimately it's the only way that God relates to us. He is never impersonal. Psalm 139; Hebrews 4:15; Ephesians 2:4-8
Each year God allows us to continue to mature is a blessing, and throughout that year, as well as every other year to follow we should walk in a way that's honoring to him. Remembering to be joyful, confident in Him, and full of hope. Isaiah 55:12; Romans 15:13
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